It’s the Little Things

Oh dear, has it really been a month since I’ve last posted? I haven’t been able to focus too much time here, you know with the full time job and all. It’s weird that sitting at a desk for 8-9 hours a day can be exhausting but lots of days, I finish work, make a quick dinner and then crawl into bed and indulge in the latest episode of How I Met Your Mother before turning on my audiobook and drifting off to sleep. But in the 7 months (holy cow, has it really been that long??) I’ve moved down here, I really think I’m beginning to get in the groove of things.

I guess this post is a self-reflection one as much as it is one to update my blog on what I’ve been up to. In the last half a year, I’ve learned more about everything than I ever thought I would. Being in college is fantastic: it’s awesome to have your best friend just a room away. There’s always something to do any given night of the week. And loneliness wasn’t really a word I ever came by. After moving down here, I’ve had a lot of alone time, whether it be to think or run errands and tidy up my single living space or just be alone for a while. While I’d hardly call it solitary, there is a component of living with/by yourself that brings things into perspective.

Firstly, I realized that moving away from my comfort zone and from most, if not all, of my friends really makes you realize which of those relationships are in it to last. I always knew that my best friend and I would never fall apart and through these months, time has only been a reminder that we’re just as close as when we lived 50 feet away from each other. We text constantly, we drunk dial each other and tell each other about the ridiculous things we’re up to, despite the fact that we’re three hours apart and often she’s already sleeping by the time I’m heading out. My sister is another prime example. With sisters, there’s no need for me to check in and see how she’s doing, but if she ever has any trouble with anything – boys, school, life – it’s just as simple as a quick text or phone call to let her know that she always has someone by her side.

The concept of making friends comes back to haunt you. In school, you’re thrown in situations where you’re forced to have some sort of interaction even if you’re not looking for it. Whether it’s through dorm living or clubs you join or even sitting through classes you hate, you somehow always manage to find a new friend, or companion, to get you through. After starting a full time job, most of the people you see are your coworkers and meeting new people is difficult. I’m lucky that my coworker who started in October was so accommodating and friendly and offered to show me around my area, one that she happened to grow up in. She’s taken me out to meet her friends, extending her circle to accommodate me and for that I’ll always be grateful. It’s so wonderful to have found a friend in the midst of all this new grad confusion.

Yea, I didn't even bother trying to hide the fact that I screenshotted my own Snapchat. #shameless

Another thing I’m attempting to make more of an effort to do is reconnect with old friends. When I graduated high school, I was so done. I was ready to leave behind high school and all its drama and never speak to anyone again. It wasn’t that I had such a terrible time in high school but I was ready to start anew and I valued that idea of a blank slate so much. Now that time has passed, it’s a bit ridiculous to see how much time and value I placed on the smallest of things. High school me was a bit of a drama queen and definitely not as mature as I thought I was. Now that most of us are graduated and in the working world, there’s not reason that petty high school drama should be a part of that. I recently chatted with a high school classmate that I had never really been particularly close to but the amicability of our conversation gives me hope that perhaps it’s never too late to start a friendship.

Lastly, I’ve really given a lot of thought and effort to valuing more small things. I’ll treat myself to lunch or dinner on the weekends bringing along a book for a companion. I don’t mind eating alone – I do it most nights anyway, but bringing along a book reminds me of days when I used to eat lunch at home and just read away the hours. Reading has always been my comfort and books make for fantastic covers for people watching! I’ve also learned to frame everything more positively. In a business where rejection looms around many corners, it’s up to me to realize that not every candidate is a placement but that doesn’t mean each candidate isn’t fraught with opportunity. Placement or not, it’s more important to value each candidate as a person and a learning experience. That mantra alone has gotten me through more days and weeks than I thought it would.

I guess I had tried to come up with a meaningful post since my friend reminded me that I haven’t updated my blog in a while but what ended up happening was a massive word dump instead. I guess I’ve just had a lot to be grateful for lately and until I began to write it all down, I didn’t realize how much of it there was. As I read back on some of my previous posts, I realize that I only wrote when something of importance happened or something that I had already documented with Instagram or Twitter or something. Some days don’t need an Instagram filter, but they’re just as good and just as important to remember.